This makes too much sense

[black_biff_stadler]

Man falls ill eating Heart Attack Grill burger

LAS VEGAS — Laughing tourists were either cynical or confused about whether a man was really suffering a medical episode amid the "doctor," "nurses" and health warnings at the Heart Attack Grill in Las Vegas, a restaurant owner said Wednesday.

"It was no joke," said Jon Basso, who promotes himself "Doctor Jon," his scantily-clad waitresses as nurses and customers as patients.

Basso said he could tell right away the man in his 40s eating a Triple Bypass burger was having trouble. He was sweating, shaking and could barely talk.

Paramedics were called Saturday night, fire spokesman Tim Szymanski said, and the man was hospitalized. His name and information about his condition weren't made public.

Giggles can be heard on the soundtrack of amateur video showing the man on a stretcher being wheeled out of the restaurant where patrons pass an antique ambulance at the door and a sign: "Caution! This establishment is bad for your health."

Eaters are given surgical gowns as they choose from a calorically extravagant menu offering "Bypass" burgers, "Flatliner" fries, buttermilk shakes and free meals to folks over 350 pounds.

Basso said he hopes the man is OK, and added that he felt bad for him because tourists treated his misfortune like a joke.

"We would never pull a stunt like that," he said.

[El Barto]

Basso said he hopes the man is OK, and added that he felt bad for him because tourists treated his misfortune like a joke.

Because he takes the whole thing so seriously.

Anyhoo, don't care.  My only issue with the place is that the food looks pretty crappy. 

[lonestar]

Wasn't me.

[black_biff_stadler]

Wasn't me.

Oh really?

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

What part of "Heart Attack Grill" did the guy not understand?

[black_biff_stadler]

I had a similarly unpleasant time when I naively visited the Urethral Rape Bistro in Poughkeepsie.

[AngelBack]

I had a similarly unpleasant time when I naively visited the Urethral Rape Bistro in Poughkeepsie.

   Funniest thing seen here in a while, well done.

[black_biff_stadler]

  Thanks pal

[Cool Chris]

Saw this on the news, and have seen this place profiled on TV. It does seem like if you wanted a super-greasy, fatty, burger and fries meal, there would be much better and tastier options. They might not have scantily clad waitresses, but even Hooters would be a better option than this place.

I seem to recall they put lard on the buns of their burgers. Since when is lard a condiment?

Wow, they even manage to be a little racist on their menus. Awesome!

[Gadough]

Eating there is on my bucket list. Granted, I should probably make it the last thing on the list.

[black_biff_stadler]

Wow, they even manage to be a little racist on their menus. Awesome!

If you're talking about the "Feeling ghetto" comment by the malt liquor cans, I implore you to go to a corner shop in any area that could be considered ghetto and see just how much shelf space is devoted to that sort of product.

[King Postwhore]

After I ate that I'd head to the "Shits my brains out lavatory". 

[bosk1]

Wow, they even manage to be a little racist on their menus. Awesome!

  Where?

[theseoafs]

Wow, they even manage to be a little racist on their menus. Awesome!

  Where?

"Feeling ghetto?", I presume.

[bosk1]

How is that racist?

[Cool Chris]

Geez, I was kidding, sorry about to confuse everyone. I am not one of them, but some people consider any usage of the term 'ghetto' to be racist.

[black_biff_stadler]

No worries. We're still Cool, Chris.

[El Barto]

How is that racist?

I suppose it depends on how one defines racism, but it definitely plays on racial stereotypes. 

[orcus116]

I had a similarly unpleasant time when I naively visited the Urethral Rape Bistro in Poughkeepsie.

I knew there was something fishy about downtown Po-town.

[bout to crash]

I had a similarly unpleasant time when I naively visited the Urethral Rape Bistro in Poughkeepsie.

Oh man, I need to sig this as soon as I figure out why it won't let me.


edit: wtf, it keeps saying my sig can't be more than four lines

[black_biff_stadler]

  Thanks! 

[wolfandwolfandwolf]

I had a similarly unpleasant time when I naively visited the Urethral Rape Bistro in Poughkeepsie.

[Rina]

What part of "Heart Attack Grill" did the guy not understand?

Apparently the "Heart Attack" bit.

[bout to crash]

I thought it was the "Grill" bit, actually, but you could be right.