Scenes From A Hat: Round 2

[jingle.boy]

From the high school wrestling coach: "I'll get down on my hands a knees, and you can start by taking me from behind."

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

From the amateur pr0n star: "I'll get down on my hands and knees, and you can start by taking me from behind."

[gmillerdrake]

Deer MP.....you are is God.....can has you play when in Mexico?

[Podaar]

Wow, this scene sounded so much funnier in my head! I was expecting something like.

"It's colder than a well digger's ass in a brass brassiere on the outside."

I need to communicate better! I'd keep this open longer but I'm heading out of town for a week.

Gary gets the victory!

[jingle.boy]

Wow, this scene sounded so much funnier in my head!

I've found that to be the case sometimes too.

[gmillerdrake]

Standings:

jingle.boy - 28
gmillerdrake - 26
lonestar - 15
kingshmegland - 13
Tempusvox - 10
Sir GuitarCozmo - 10
Podaar - 9
BlobVanDam - 8
Zydar - 6
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
masterthes - 5
Jonnybaxy - 3
Scorpion - 3
Prog Snob - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash - 2
TheSilentHam - 2
Ruba - 2
JayOctavarium - 2
El Barto - 1
Lolzeez - 1
soundgarden - 1
Lucien - 1
MetalJunkie - 1
Jaffa - 1

This isn't quite a 'Scene' per say.....but give me your best, most odd....funniest..etc Three word sentence.

[jingle.boy]

Best scene ever. 

Blues win Cup!

Love the TSA.

[TempusVox]

Cubs win series
Clinton elected Pope
Tom Cruise sane
Justin Bieber swallows

[jingle.boy]

Inlaw's basement rules

Me so horny

[jonnybaxy]

Stationary Store Moves

Recent Dwarf Shortage

Ass and Balls

[lonestar]

Anal seepage milkshake

[gmillerdrake]

Recent Dwarf Shortage

This is just odd and strange enough to be an actual headline in a newscast, plus...it made me chuckle a bit. You're the winner.

Oh and RJ

Anal seepage milkshake

       That's just wrong.....but oddly has there not been a dwarf shortage this would have taken it.

[jonnybaxy]

Thanks Gary,

Standings:

jingle.boy - 28
gmillerdrake - 26
lonestar - 15
kingshmegland - 13
Tempusvox - 10
Sir GuitarCozmo - 10
Podaar - 9
BlobVanDam - 8
Zydar - 6
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
masterthes - 5
Jonnybaxy - 4
Scorpion - 3
Prog Snob - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash - 2
TheSilentHam - 2
Ruba - 2
JayOctavarium - 2
El Barto - 1
Lolzeez - 1
soundgarden - 1
Lucien - 1
MetalJunkie - 1
Jaffa - 1

Next scene: Worst thing to say in a children's hospital.

[masterthes]

You're all going to die!

[jingle.boy]

Listen up everyone.  George can't make it tomorrow, so who wants to play Santa for these brats?

I'm Maury Povich, here with your paternity test results.

Sure, it's my first circumcision, but I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

That's nothin!  Wanna see MY hernia?  It's like I got a three-pack of tennis balls down there.

[King Postwhore]

Santa will be performing your surgery. He's really a doctor.

[lonestar]

Cancer ward? Looks like a bunch of midget Jingle.boys in there...







(I'm so going to hell for that one)

[gmillerdrake]

The Board of Aldermans have been replaced by Three Mexicans.

Anyone who cries gets stuck with this 16 gauge needle in the eye....got it!

[lonestar]

Kid, this ain't Oz, and you ain't no Tinman. Sorry, but there's no heart for you, only doooooooooom...........

[gmillerdrake]

Just thought I'd tell you that there will be no Christmas this year......I just saw Santa in the ER with an antler sticking through his jugular.....wasn't pretty....

[jingle.boy]

Who's looking forward to this morning's anal probe!!!

[gmillerdrake]

Who's looking forward to this morning's anal probe!!!

Wait....Chad, isn't that your normal line when entering ANY new setting?

[King Postwhore]

We'll find out tomorrow about that!


Hey Charlie, that bed next to you will be free tomorrow if you want the bed next to the window.

[jonnybaxy]

Kid, this ain't Oz, and you ain't no Tinman. Sorry, but there's no heart for you, only doooooooooom...........

Winner!

With a runner up of pure and simple,

You're all going to die!

[lonestar]

Sweet, thanks man, had a feeling about that one...


Standings:

jingle.boy - 28
gmillerdrake - 26
lonestar - 16
kingshmegland - 13
Tempusvox - 10
Sir GuitarCozmo - 10
Podaar - 9
BlobVanDam - 8
Zydar - 6
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
masterthes - 5
Jonnybaxy - 4
Scorpion - 3
Prog Snob - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash - 2
TheSilentHam - 2
Ruba - 2
JayOctavarium - 2
El Barto - 1
Lolzeez - 1
soundgarden - 1
Lucien - 1
MetalJunkie - 1
Jaffa - 1

Next scene- Things not to tell your waiter/waitress at a restaurant....

[jingle.boy]

If lonestar cooked this, I ain't eatin it!

They call me Mr. Pink.

[gmillerdrake]

Maybe your just deaf or dumb....or both, but I asked for this Steak Medium Rare not Medium....now take it back and give me what I asked for.

[Jaffa]

"I'm sorry, but I can't seem to find your vagina anywhere on the menu.  How much?"

Bonus points if it's a guy.

[jingle.boy]

What the fuck you mean there's no bread pudding on the menu?!?!

How's your snapper tonight?

And make it quick toots, I wanna catch the 8 o'clock showing of The Devil Wears Prada.

I CAN SMELL YOUR PUSSY!

[masterthes]

I lost my job today, so just letting you know in advance, no matter what you do, I'm going to sue the pants off this place and they're going to find you personally responsible. So, what does your wine list look like?

[gmillerdrake]

Grade 'A' establishment huh? More like Grade 'DD'....

You know I own a restaurant also, I serve one item only.....Tube Steak....wanna work for me?

[cramx3]

Ill have the cream-of-sum-yung-guy and she'll have the cumquats.

[TempusVox]

"...and another thing 'chicka'...when you bring it to me, try not to stick your big hairy knuckles in my food. Got it!"

[jonnybaxy]

Can I have a menu please? I need something to hide me masturbating.

[lonestar]

"I'm sorry, but I can't seem to find your vagina anywhere on the menu.  How much?"

I have to see this done someday, and I know just the uptight bitch to do it to.

You're up bro!!!